9 Good Reasons Friendship Should Be the Basis of Any Relationship

It’s not always easy to predict how things will turn out when dating somebody new.

Will the two of you end up walking down the aisle; will you end up driving each other crazy, or will the communication simply die out with time, without the spark to carry you past the second date?

There are so many ways a new relationship prospect can go; however, there is one small piece of advice that could make your life so much easier.

That bit of advice is to build a friendship with somebody first, before dating them.

“Build a friendship first?” you may be saying. “But that could take ages!”

The truth is that yeah, being friends with somebody before considering a relationship with them does put the brakes on things a little.

However, there are many good reasons for this, for which we’re sure you’ll thank us later.

Here are 9 good reasons all relationships should be preceded by friendship.

1. You’ll both have shared interests.
Why do we become friends with people? Well, it usually all starts with having similar interests and hobbies. It’s often one of the simplest foundations on which most friendships flourish.

If you and your partner were friends first, you’ll likely already know how they’d like to spend their Friday night, or what they’d like to do on their day off. Similarly, spending time together will be easier, as you won’t need to segregate time apart in order to do the things you both love.

Of course, you guys won’t agree on everything, and that person doesn’t have to be a carbon copy of you (and shouldn’t be). But if you’re both into hiking, healthy eating and watching conspiratorial documentaries, the chances are you’ll enjoy spending time together more than if you had to compromise on these things.

2. You’ll already have what it takes to make a relationship work
This isn’t to say that every friendship will or should lead to a relationship (some people are just friends for a reason!).

But most good friendships naturally involve trustworthiness, fun, loyalty, honesty and genuine connection – all of the qualities it takes to make a relationship work. Therefore, if you and your friend do decide to take things to the next level, a strong foundation will already have been paved.

3. It removes a huge amount of pressure
Forming a friendship with someone removes all of the usual pressures that often come with dating.

The pressure to perform in the bedroom, or to put across only the side of yourself you think the other one will like, can often get in the way of an otherwise great relationship.

When you build a friendship, you can allow yourself to be vulnerable; to be honest, and to have that person see you at your worst as well as your best. There’s also less fear of rejection – so if a disagreement or obstacle did arise, you’re less likely to compromise your morals in order to still be attractive to the other person.

After being friends for a while, you can of course introduce the usual pressures of dating later on, but you’ll be much better equipped to handle them.

4. You’ll find the other person more attractive
Research has shown that we find people more attractive the longer we know them (or are friends with them).

In a study by researchers at the University of Texas, students were asked to rate one another at the beginning and end of the semester. Overall, ratings increased over time, with sixes becoming nines in a matter of weeks.

This suggests that aesthetics have less to do with it than we think. By simply getting to know one another and forging connections, the way we perceive others immediately becomes more favourable.

5. The most enduring romantic relationships are more about compatibility than sexuality
Time and time again, studies have shown that long-lasting love is more about compatibility and companionship than sexuality.

The same researchers at the University of Texas carried out another study in which they interviewed 167 long-term couples. 40% of those couples said they were friends before their relationship began, suggesting there’s a lot to be said for getting to know your interest on a platonic level.

6. Initial first impressions aren’t coloured by physical attraction or lust
More often than not, it’s easy for people to fall into a relationship simply by hearing the ‘right’ things. Similarly, when we fall for someone physically, that lust and desire to ‘get’ something physical from the relationship may blind us to who they really are.

Becoming friends first, with no physical expectations, allows us to step back and see if that person is truly a good match for us. You’ll be able to see that person exactly as they are, in a range of emotional states and scenarios, and decide whether their personality truly meets your standards or whether your values really align.

That way, there’s less time and heartache spent if nothing romantic comes out of the relationship.

7. You’ll have more experience communicating with each other
All too often, couples get into arguments not because they disagree, but because they simply misinterpret each other or have trouble saying what they really mean.

We all have different ways of expressing our feelings and labelling emotions. In fact, while some couples might be on the same page semantically, they can be speaking entirely different ‘love languages’, which leads to a lot of mixed messages or crossed wires.

As friends, however, you’ll be less likely to experience this problem. Friends have usually learned to interpret one another’s language and communicate in a way that is free and easy, especially if they have been friends a long time. Therefore, when you become lovers, you’ll find it much easier to get your meaning across and enjoy a mutual understanding.

8. You can still date other people
By not committing to a relationship too early, you’ll be free to explore other possibilities whilst still enjoying and building a budding friendship.

Even if you feel strongly about one person and are sure they are “the one”, it’s a good idea to still date other people, in case the right one for you is still out there.

9. Friendships keep us rational, stable and logical
We all know that relationships can do funny things to people. Because emotions run high in a relationship, we’re all too likely to become a little irrational, clingy or do something rash in an ‘act of love’.

However, in friendships we tend to be much more grounded. We’re always kind to a friend; we look out for their best interests, and play an equal part in the partnership. Because there’s no feeling of ownership (at least, there shouldn’t be), people are less likely to become possessive or controlling.

Of course, there’s always a chance you might become that crazy person after you’ve started dating your friend. But if the friendship is strong, and the fit is right, it’ll be much more likely to handle it.

A ‘friends first’ approach to dating
It may be difficult to get your head around this new approach to dating at first. Thanks to GreyZone Club, you could meet people with a difference and find true friendship that could lead to a meaningful relationship.

Set against the backdrop of London’s exciting nightlife scene, GreyZone Club offers the chance to meet people on the same wave-length through unique events like speed dating, singles nights, masquerade balls and other themed parties.

As the only dating agency in London with a ‘friends first’ approach to dating, GreyZone Club helps busy, ambitious professionals meet like-minded people in a way that seamlessly fits their lifestyle.

So ditch the monotony of swiping left and right and replace it with exciting, real-life situations, by becoming a member of GreyZone Club.

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How to have more fun as a single dating in London without pressure

London is one of the world’s top cities for arts and entertainment, a great place for both singles and couples to have fun. Whether you’re looking for a chance to let your hair down or enjoy a spot of culture, there is no shortage of options.

 

For those in the capital who are single, it can sometimes feel like a challenge taking advantage of all the city has to offer. Experiences are best shared, so heading out to see a show, a film, or an exhibition is only going to be half as much fun if you haven’t got someone to bounce off. You can’t always rely on friends to be available, especially ones with family commitments. Work colleagues can be fun but there’s always the danger of talking shop and blurring the personal with the professional.

So what can you do if your favourite artist is in town, your friends are all tied up and nobody in the office is interested? There’s the option of using dating sites to find a wing buddy, but this inevitably comes with the expectation of taking things further romantically. What is needed is a service that can partner people up with those who share their interests but without the pressure that comes with online dating or speed dating, where things can develop organically while the emphasis is always on having a great time in great company.

This is the idea behind the GreyZone Club, a unique concept for cosmopolitan singles looking for something a bit different. This exclusive lifestyle dating club gives members the chance to meet other elite singles who want to explore what’s on in London with others but aren’t necessarily looking to jump straight into a relationship. The club can introduce you to a diverse community where you can find others who are on the same relationship page as you.

Join GreyZone and you’ll get access to special offers, tailored events and exclusive London parties that you can enjoy with other members, including:

  • Late night V&A exhibitions
  • Classic live sporting occasions (Wimbledon, Six Nations)
  • Cirque du Soleil
  • Ascot
  • Boodles
  • Goodwood Festival of Speed
  • West End shows and Cabaret
  • Trendy restaurants, coffee shops and bars
  • GreyZone Club parties and events

Club membership means you’ll also get inside information on all the top upcoming London events and be kept up to date with loyalty programs offered by Museums, Galleries and other venues. For thrill-seeking singles living in London and those new to the capital, GreyZone offers you the chance to make your inner circle wider and get to know London with others on the same vibe as you.

So, if you feel like your single life is lacking something that’s not necessarily an immediate long-term relationship, give lifestyle dating a try and join the GreyZone Club.

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Speed dating vs Online Dating: Time for something new

The dating game has changed a lot over the past couple of decades since the world wide web went mainstream. The old Lonely Hearts clubs and blind dates arranged by friends have given way to the more modern concepts of online dating and speed dating in terms of the most popular ways that people date with strangers.

But although these new strategies have their merits and have undoubtedly let to romantic success in many cases, they are not without their problems and leave a lot of people feeling as if their needs are not being met.

Let’s start with speed dating. This is a matchmaking process where people attend an event and have a series of 5-7 minute chats with prospective “dates” in quick succession to see if they click and want to take things further. It’s obviously designed with busy modern day professionals in mind, cosmopolitan singles who don’t want to sacrifice a whole evening on someone they might not even like.

But although you get a few minutes and questions to screen potential partners, it’s all too brief and in an environment far too removed from reality to be of any real use. Five minutes is enough time to weed out those you really dislike or don’t fancy, but not long enough to work out anything else. The chance of romantic success is probably the same as throwing a stick in Hyde park and dating the first person to pick it up.

Online dating has a slightly higher success rate, but the dating sites are still full of users who struggle to find fulfilment or who end up giving up after one too many bad dates. Perhaps the problems are similar to speed dating. Although this process involves full dates rather than 5 minute chats, you’re still bombarded with messages, likes, thousands of other user profiles distracting you. You become overwhelmed, making snap decisions on faceless messages or complex algorithms trying to reduce everything to maths, swiping left or right based on a picture…

The problem with these concepts is there’s too much pressure on getting it right and finding “the one”.  Each encounter is loaded with expectation. True romance and companionship takes time to grow in a more natural environment. For those fed up with the same old same old of standard dating sites, it’s time for a new approach…

It’s time to step into the grey zone. GreyZone Club is about getting back to the basics and giving like-minded people the space to develop meaningful bonds in a no-pressure environment. Our exclusive lifestyle dating club will put you in touch with other elite singles who share your interests. The emphasis is on having great time in great company with no expectations.

Join our club to expand your inner circle and connect with others in your area who share your lifestyle tastes. We use technology not to tell you you’re a 97% love match with someone but to bring people looking to enjoy similar lifestyle experiences together for fun times. We let them work out the rest.

 

So if you want to apply some common sense strategy towards your dating and try something different, visit www.greyzoneclub.com.

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